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Question on introducing and bonding
#1410846
07/09/17 06:07 PM
07/09/17 06:07 PM
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Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 36 South FL
Procrastib8or
OP
In Pouch
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OP
In Pouch
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 36
South FL
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Just got out first glider, Daisy, two days ago. Things have been going quite well so far, but I can't stop thinking about getting her a friend. After receiving input from people here and doing research myself, it seems like a very positive thing to do and is in the best interest of the animal. However, I have a few concerns: Timing: Unfortunately, we don't have the funds to rush out and buy another right away. I can't seem to find a solid answer (story of my life with these creatures) if there is a huge difference in when gliders are introduced. It pretty much boils down to: Would it be harmful to wait 6 months to a year before getting a new joey? Murder: Before getting our baby we heard quite the horror story. A friend of mine told me they bought two gliders together from the same breeder. Within the first night, one killed the other. She told the breeder and the breeder just replaced the dead one, and the new one was also murdered. She then returned the glider and decided to get a hamster because she was traumatized. I don't know who the breeder was and I can only imagine they weren't very good. But again it boils down to this: Would murder have to be a big concern? bonding: So, Daisy is going to bond solely to my gf and we just want her to be cool with me. If we were to get another, we would have him/her bond solely to me. So, would this be an issue? By the time we get another Daisy will likely be fully bonded with my gf, even though I know it will also bond with the other glider (not really sure how that works) But would this affect my bonding with the new glider? Would we be able to bond strong enough during the quarantine period so he/she bonds first to me and second to Daisy? Am I overthinking this? My other concern with bonding is my gf. She kind of got screwed over with or dog (I bought her the dog but the dogs likes me a whole lot more) which is why she is so obsessed with her sugar baby (because she knows how strong their bond can be) So I am concerned that another glider could change Daisy and make their bond weaker. I know this is selfish and I will probably get crap for it, but hopefully someone understands and can give me advice without being too harsh. Thanks so much if you actually read my ramblings.
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: Procrastib8or]
#1410859
07/10/17 10:05 AM
07/10/17 10:05 AM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 43,319 LittleRock, AR USA
KarenE
Owner
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Owner
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 43,319
LittleRock, AR USA
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So sorry this post did not get any responses earlier. My apologies.
Here is a good Article on How to Introduce Gliders to Each Other writer by our very own Feather/Kim I think you will find it very helpful when the time comes. Just got out first glider, Daisy, two days ago. Things have been going quite well so far, but I can't stop thinking about getting her a friend. After receiving input from people here and doing research myself, it seems like a very positive thing to do and is in the best interest of the animal. However, I have a few concerns: You will hear varying opinions on getting her a buddy from you must do it immediately, to she will die without a buddy This last one is simply NOT TRUE. Many gliders do well as a single, however, like most they do prefer having a cage mate.
Not everyone is in a position to have two immediately, and I understand. As you get to know Daisy's personality, she will give you signals if she is lonely or needing more than you are able to give her. There may be subtle indications that only you and your g/f will be able to pick up on which we can talk about later. Right now she is just fine Timing: Unfortunately, we don't have the funds to rush out and buy another right away. I can't seem to find a solid answer (story of my life with these creatures) if there is a huge difference in when gliders are introduced. It pretty much boils down to: Would it be harmful to wait 6 months to a year before getting a new joey? Murder: Before getting our baby we heard quite the horror story. A friend of mine told me they bought two gliders together from the same breeder. Within the first night, one killed the other. She told the breeder and the breeder just replaced the dead one, and the new one was also murdered. She then returned the glider and decided to get a hamster because she was traumatized. I don't know who the breeder was and I can only imagine they weren't very good. But again it boils down to this: Would murder have to be a big concern? What happened above is very rare. If you search our Archives, you would be hard pressed to find postings about this particular subject, and trust me, this is something I would definitely keep for future reference. There are so many variables that might have caused this to happen, but just from reading, my guess would be the original glider (who was for sure dominate) was not accepting another. This we have encountered, but normally the two would not be left alone during introductions long enough to result in death. Usually with such an aggressive glider, it would be easy to tell quickly what the outcome would be. Very very sad, and not something you need to worry about. bonding: So, Daisy is going to bond solely to my gf and we just want her to be cool with me. If we were to get another, we would have him/her bond solely to me. So, would this be an issue? By the time we get another Daisy will likely be fully bonded with my gf, even though I know it will also bond with the other glider (not really sure how that works) But would this affect my bonding with the new glider? Would we be able to bond strong enough during the quarantine period so he/she bonds first to me and second to Daisy? Am I overthinking this? My other concern with bonding is my gf. She kind of got screwed over with or dog (I bought her the dog but the dogs likes me a whole lot more) which is why she is so obsessed with her sugar baby (because she knows how strong their bond can be) So I am concerned that another glider could change Daisy and make their bond weaker. I know this is selfish and I will probably get crap for it, but hopefully someone understands and can give me advice without being too harsh. Gliders will bond with whoever interacts with them. Yes, they usually bond with one person, but that is because one person is usually the primary caregiver.
Gliders are also just like people in that some are more trusting, receptive to humans that others. Daisy is having a positive interaction with the two of you, so she has no reason to be fearful. I have seen gliders at glider gatherings who would go to anyone who wanted to hold them because they had been raised with love around a loving family.
In your case, there is no reason both of you cannot take on the responsibility and be a part of the bonding process. Both of you in the bathroom and tent (if possible) at the same time giving Daisy the benefit of both your attention. It's a win win process Thanks so much if you actually read my ramblings.
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: KarenE]
#1410862
07/10/17 11:33 AM
07/10/17 11:33 AM
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Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 36 South FL
Procrastib8or
OP
In Pouch
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OP
In Pouch
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 36
South FL
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So sorry this post did not get any responses earlier. My apologies. No need to apologize. I appreciate all the information, and that introduction thread is very interesting. However, it does mention my biggest fear, which would be the two of them bonding and not wanting any more contact with us. But, thinking like that is selfish I suppose. We likely will wait at least a few months and we will observe her as you said and see if she seems lonely and act based on that.
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: Procrastib8or]
#1410863
07/10/17 11:46 AM
07/10/17 11:46 AM
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 43,319 LittleRock, AR USA
KarenE
Owner
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Owner
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 43,319
LittleRock, AR USA
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I prefer to go by the principle of not borrowing trouble Don't expect the worse before it ever happens.
Your Daisy is wonderful example of a good bonding experience. You may have a few minor setbacks, but at this point I wouldn't expect any. She seems to be settling in and loving her new home.
Both of you are doing a fantastic job with her
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: Procrastib8or]
#1410879
07/11/17 01:49 AM
07/11/17 01:49 AM
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 4,321 SW Missouri USA
Ladymagyver
Moderator
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Moderator
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 4,321
SW Missouri USA
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I appreciate all the information, and that introduction thread is very interesting. However, it does mention my biggest fear, which would be the two of them bonding and not wanting any more contact with us. But, thinking like that is selfish I suppose. It's not selfish. And I don't agree. Fiona is my first, we got Dot 4 weeks later, and they were introduced 4 weeks after that. Fiona was bonded to me before they were introduced. They are now both bonded, however Fiona has her "special " alone time with me once in awhile still.
Dawn Be patient, and Trust your journey.... Grace Ruby Mom Fiona, Dot, Stewie and Dad Wish I could turn back time... Miss you all...
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: Procrastib8or]
#1410880
07/11/17 02:37 AM
07/11/17 02:37 AM
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 4,321 SW Missouri USA
Ladymagyver
Moderator
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Moderator
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 4,321
SW Missouri USA
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One more thought... Separation anxiety. If you and gf ever "split the sheets", the gliders should stay together.
Gliders have a lifespan of 10-15 years. That is a long commitment. Are you ready?
Dawn Be patient, and Trust your journey.... Grace Ruby Mom Fiona, Dot, Stewie and Dad Wish I could turn back time... Miss you all...
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Re: Question on introducing and bonding
[Re: Procrastib8or]
#1410893
07/12/17 03:29 AM
07/12/17 03:29 AM
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Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,490 Belleville, IL
Hutch
Glider Slave
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Glider Slave
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,490
Belleville, IL
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bonding: So, Daisy is going to bond solely to my gf and we just want her to be cool with me. If we were to get another, we would have him/her bond solely to me. So, would this be an issue? By the time we get another Daisy will likely be fully bonded with my gf, even though I know it will also bond with the other glider (not really sure how that works) But would this affect my bonding with the new glider? Would we be able to bond strong enough during the quarantine period so he/she bonds first to me and second to Daisy? Am I overthinking this? My other concern with bonding is my gf. She kind of got screwed over with or dog (I bought her the dog but the dogs likes me a whole lot more) which is why she is so obsessed with her sugar baby (because she knows how strong their bond can be) So I am concerned that another glider could change Daisy and make their bond weaker. I know this is selfish and I will probably get crap for it, but hopefully someone understands and can give me advice without being too harsh. This has already been answered quite well... but, I'm going to throw my 2 copper pieces in to the mix anyways. If for no other reason than to hopefully show you how the fluffballs work & what everyone has said is a 'normal' experience... well, as normal as animated, hyperactive dryer lint can ever be. Bottom line up front: yes, you're over thinking it. The gliders will choose for themselves. I have four. I dove head first in to the deep end by starting with four. They came with four very different personalities which is represented by their bonding & interactions with me. I've done my best to have them meet people, let people give them treats, & interact when they look interested. My two girls are fairly bonded with me (Gwynevere gets vocal if I don't give her enough attention a night). Arthur for the longest time preferred the cage to play time, though he was comfortable when interacting with me (he much prefers ladies, seriously). Merlin... he's a timid work in progress, but he trusts me. Again, they've all had the same experiences & opportunities since arriving January of 2017. I do not feel the colony has slowed down my bonding. MAAAAYBEEE Merlin would be a little more bonded, but I believe it would be a minor difference. He really likes the security of his 'territory.' So, despite me treating them the same, this just goes to show how much the individual glider factors in to the equation. What I'm trying to illustrate is how they view themselves (& me) as just fellow colony members. If you both interacted with Daisy often, she will bond with both of you. Same with a new glider. Your gf spending more time will have Daisy bond faster to her, but in the end she'll look at both of you as oversized furless gliders who make funny noises. Each glider will interact with you two (& the rest of his/her colony) as they decide. Just like when a female visits how Arthur forgets about me & goes for her while Gwyn is marking the hell out of me & refuses to let me out of her site. In then end, either of you could bond first & the other second... just understand that doesn't mean that person will be primary or secondary. If she is the primary caretaker & player, they'll be more comfortable with her, for sure; but the glider will pee on whomever the glider want to pee on.
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