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Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #761646
04/06/09 10:09 PM
04/06/09 10:09 PM

C
Critteromine
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Critteromine
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I am! I'm soaking up info like a sponge and can use all the help I can get.

I've had my two kids for about a month and a half. I'm making very slow progress, which thrills me since it is progress! I can now put my hand on them and pet them. They will sometimes curl up under my hand. I can't pick them up yet and I don't feel comfortable letting them jump off me to roam, when we aren't in the tent.

Once I started taking them with me to work, it helped a lot. My boy is much more open to attention and greets me in the morning but the girl is still a biter, although she is getting better and allows me to touch her. They both respond to my voice and will calm down if something startles them.

Please, please, please continue the human training! I love my little ones like crazy and want them as happy as possible.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #761712
04/06/09 11:51 PM
04/06/09 11:51 PM

P
prettyinpink
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prettyinpink
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I AM ready... I already said it. I'm just wondering what the heck is going on... I think you don't get what I am asking.

I want to work with you guys... I'm just getting frustrated. Not with my gliders but you. I don't even want to say that because I don't want any fighting going on. You have NO idea how much I appreciate you guys.

Critteromine- The thing is why I'm so frustrated is I CAN pick Pixie and Tinkerbell both up. She just bites every so often which I'm trying to understand why.

I'm just wondering why when I was looking at posts from later dates and Monikas for example you guys are saying completly different things to the both of us. dunno

I may sound mean right now but trust me I'm just wondering what we are doing? No one really explained that to me. Don't think of me as a baby crying out. I'm just wondering simply put what we're doing. All you're telling me is what to do not what we are going to do. NO I'm not going to just jump onto step 6. I'm the type of person that wants to know what's going on. That's just me... if you don't like it sorry. I'm a really nice person and I'm just asking you to listen to me. And NO I don't want everything fixed today, right now. I told everyone before I have patience... You have no idea what I went through with Kirby. LOL. He's a different animal but I had to teach him to like me and trust me. I've been told by many people that they've never seen a beardie as calm and well behaved as him. I've accomplished a lot with him by being patient. And that's what I'm doing now.

I think you guys aren't understanding me or something...

The thing is with typing I can't see your expressions. Linda said this before that it's really hard for us to read what you're writing without seeing facial expressions.

Do you guys get what I'm asking though?

--Wanted to say... I've been opening the cage door every so often and saying it's going to be ok and how much I love them and miss them right now. I ONLY do that right? No touching the pouch or anything right?

I'm really nervous for tonight... LOL. Because I let them out when the doors open at night for a few hours if I can. When the lights go off I go get their food and they are up waiting for me. So I'm going to have to sneak their food in.

My question is... why do you have to open the cage door? Couldn't you just talk to them with it shut? Or does it not matter?

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #761780
04/07/09 05:33 AM
04/07/09 05:33 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 274
Southeast Iowa
Ember Offline
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Ember  Offline
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 274
Southeast Iowa
I'm utilizing this thread! Not practicing as of right now, but definitely reading it and taking it into consideration. I have a new baby who bites. Not so much on the hands, but all over when she's running around on me during tent time. Back of my neck, on my arm, my feet! I think she thinks I'm going to ooze treats! However it is painful, and I don't want to be nervous she's going to bite me all the time. I try covering all my skin by like wearing a hoodie and long pants, but if my hoodie should ride up a bit on my back, she'll find that skin and nibble it, then go in for a second taste which is a bite. I psst at her, which doesn't seem to do much unless I Reeeeaally psst, which I think is just giving her attention and not good. She does the same thing to my boyfriend, with the biting of the exposed skin. I don't think it's aggression as much as I think she honestly thinks there's going to be a treat coming out. I think she likes how we taste, which is a nice compliment, but I don't want to be tasted anymore! LOL crazy She doesn't bite my hand when I stick it in the pouch, but I also don't try to give her the opportunity, I watch her head and really watch to anticipate a bite. She allows petting. We're still feeling eachother out, but if it continues I'll be trying these steps your mentioning. Just thought I'd let you know that someone else is paying attention and benefiting! Thank you!!


Casey


Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Ember] #761781
04/07/09 05:36 AM
04/07/09 05:36 AM
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 274
Southeast Iowa
Ember Offline
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Ember  Offline
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 274
Southeast Iowa
Also I want to wish you luck with Pixie! Even though I have no experience as of yet to offer! clown


Casey


Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Ember] #761791
04/07/09 07:01 AM
04/07/09 07:01 AM

M
missyskandi
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missyskandi
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Yes! Bourbon I am watching this post and go to read EVERY time a new post is made. You and Dee are talking to everyone!

When I first got my babies, one was a sweetie (Dora)and one was a biter of the absolute worst kind (Missy). She was literally drawing blood everyday. I was frustrated beyond belief and just cried. Then from a post on here, I realized Missy was feeling my frustration, and I completely changed my tatics. She is now the nicer of the two and the one who never crabs and is all cuddly and lovey. That being said... I am reading this to see what comes next to compare it to what I did, and to pick up any tips I can for the Dora who does still crab ~ AND to see if there is something else that I can do the even further strengthen the bond with either or both of them.

In addition, I have a friend with a biter that I am trying to help work with, and I am using what you are writing so I can go back to her and let her know how she can overcome it too.

Sorry I have been lurking and not adding in, but until now, I didn't really have anything to say. I am sure there are others who are just reading to learn and not necessarily posting so PLEASE continue with the process for us! You are doing an amazing job!

Thanks a million for all that you and everyone on this board do!

Last edited by missyskandi; 04/07/09 10:43 AM. Reason: typos!
Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #761977
04/07/09 06:57 PM
04/07/09 06:57 PM
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
DeeDancer Offline
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DeeDancer  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
I understand what you're asking, Erica, but Bourbon does this step by step because if she gave you all of the information at once it would be overwhelming. I think there's enough to think about just right now, what with realizing that your gliders pick up on your emotions and everything else that Bourbon said in her long 2 part post. We want you to focus on each part. Quite honestly if I were to sit here and tell you this whole process it would be a really long, information filled post (if it even fit in one post) and you would feel overwhelmed.

Opening the cage door is important because you want to teach them that when the cage door opens it doesn't necessarily mean that you are going to touch the pouch or them or anything.

Now...Bourbon said this:

Originally Posted By: bourbon
Let us know, what you are noticing, what you are now seeing from both, your eyes and your gliders... remember from here on out, you are looking at life through THEIR eyes, working on THEIR time, on THEIR terms, not yours.


What have you noticed so far about your gliders (and possibly about yourself)?


~Deanna~
Chinchillas: Luke, Yoda, and Pronk
Gliders: Nika, Ranger, and DeeGee

(702)250-5236
Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Ember] #761993
04/07/09 08:04 PM
04/07/09 08:04 PM

P
prettyinpink
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prettyinpink
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Ok. Thanks for saying that Deanna... Now that makes sense. But I still don't understand why I'm getting different responses. Like I can pick them both up with no question and they'll come up and cuddle with me... I guess I don't think of them being scared of me because they are doing just this. Like when Monika created that post you guys said differently. I just feel like I did something wrong and that's why I have to do this. Do you get what I mean?

What have I noticed so far? What do you mean... Like I said before after Bourbon created that post that I realize how scared they probably are... but I knew that before. She explained that same exact thing on the phone to me when I called her about a private issue. But did explain it better on here.

Last night they were barking like CRAZY! frown When I went to give them their food I just looked at them in their eyes... and they just sat there staring at me asking to be out. I didn't want to tease them so I just sat there and talked for a little bit. They wanted out so it did hurt to see them wanting to be out. But I did as I was told and just softly talked to them. I DIDN'T touch them once... this is very hard for me. LOL.
I've been looking into their actual eyes a lot more... like last night.

I'm doing the same thing today. Just opening the cage door and just softly talking to them.

It's amazing how fast you can get attached to them... and how much you can miss them just from a simple thing like this.

Originally Posted By: Ember
Also I want to wish you luck with Pixie! Even though I have no experience as of yet to offer! clown

Thank you! hug2

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762009
04/07/09 09:09 PM
04/07/09 09:09 PM
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
DeeDancer Offline
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DeeDancer  Offline
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
But I still don't understand why I'm getting different responses.


Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
Like when Monika created that post you guys said differently.


I know I didn't reply to Monika's thread. I glanced through both threads and did not see anyone who replied to her that also replied to you, so I'm really not sure who you mean why you say "you guys". Also, based on what I've read in her post & yours, it doesn't seem that Pixie's behavior is the same as Pagen's. Monika said her glider's bites don't hurt, but you said that Pixies do. There's a definite difference there.

Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
I've been looking into their actual eyes a lot more... like last night.


This is a good thing!!

When I asked what you noticed... I just mean to keep looking into their eyes and watching their body language, trying to read how they feel or what they are going to do next. I was asking if there was anything new that you could tell about their actions.

It really is hard, but the result will be worth it!


~Deanna~
Chinchillas: Luke, Yoda, and Pronk
Gliders: Nika, Ranger, and DeeGee

(702)250-5236
Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: DeeDancer] #762020
04/07/09 11:14 PM
04/07/09 11:14 PM

P
prettyinpink
Unregistered
prettyinpink
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Oh yeah. I guess I read over the biting part where it didn't hurt. I have very thin skin and bruise easily though. tounge
I didn't really mean you specifically I meant that Pixie is doing the same thing hers is doing to me but people suggested different things. But her bites do hurt.

Good to know.

Still been doing the talking thing. Opening the cage door and talking... not touching them like you said wink

EDIT: I just looked at her post again... she said it doesn't hurt 'that bad but it doesn't feel good' that's exactly what I said... LOL

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762024
04/07/09 11:33 PM
04/07/09 11:33 PM
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
DeeDancer Offline
Glider Guardian
DeeDancer  Offline
Glider Guardian

Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,035
Las Vegas, NV/Columbus, OH
You said:

Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
Trust me it's not a pretty bite. She doesn't lunge or anything but it hurts.


I don't want to argue with you here but you said the bites hurt you, so it still sounds like different behavior to me.

Regardless, there is no "one way" to get something done. Some gliders respond to certain things while other gliders don't. People are going to post what they personally have had success with, that doesn't necessarily mean that there is a cut and dry answer for everything, even if the situations are similar.

Keep up the good work!


~Deanna~
Chinchillas: Luke, Yoda, and Pronk
Gliders: Nika, Ranger, and DeeGee

(702)250-5236
Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: DeeDancer] #762026
04/07/09 11:58 PM
04/07/09 11:58 PM

B
BelladonnasMom
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BelladonnasMom
Unregistered
B



If you want my advice Erica, listen to these women. If you really want it to work, and you really want to work with these women, just listen, and stop worrying about what comes next and what you are doing wrong. Chances are you ARE NOT doing anything wrong, they are just offering you a BETTER way to get to the bottom line YOU want, but with happier gliders. I can promise you this much, these women will NEVER ask you to do something that will A) hurt your gliders, B)hurt YOU, C) hurt the progress you have made with your gliders. This entire process is designed to help you and your gliders, but mainly your gliders.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762029
04/08/09 12:18 AM
04/08/09 12:18 AM

P
prettyinpink
Unregistered
prettyinpink
Unregistered
P



Deanna... Sorry. This is all just new to me. I'm not trying to argue I'm just having a hard time here... hopefully you understand what I mean. I'm just a little emotional when it comes to my babies.
I can't wait to see what's going to happen wink
I just want to thank you for cooperating with me and helping me with this hug2 You have no idea how much this means to me even if I seem like I don't appreciate you... I DO very much so. Thank you so much for checking out this post and helping me along this road. I really, really appreciate it. hug2

Robin... I AM listening to everything they have to say. I've done nothing BUT listen to them. I appreciate everything they have to say and I've said so. I'm just getting frustrated and confused... I didn't create this post to ask people to come on here to do this. I asked for help and that's what she's giving me and I've been nothing but following it.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762048
04/08/09 01:42 AM
04/08/09 01:42 AM

B
BelladonnasMom
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BelladonnasMom
Unregistered
B



Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
I'm just getting frustrated and confused... I didn't create this post to ask people to come on here to do this. I asked for help and that's what she's giving me and I've been nothing but following it.


Then what DID you ask for Erica??? You asked for help. This is YOUR thread. If this is NOT the kind of help you are looking for, you are more than welcome to ask these people to stop and leave you alone. BUT... they are here to help if you want them to, and they will. They, and myself, are not here to upset you at all. We are just offering the knowledge and experience that WE have to help you.

Please... if you want to go this route... stop being so defensive. This is not a cult, or a draft. If you aren't comfortable with all of this, neither will our gliders be...

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762054
04/08/09 02:46 AM
04/08/09 02:46 AM
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 323
Twin Lakes, WI
Nicki Offline
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Nicki  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 323
Twin Lakes, WI
So, I finally sat down and just read this ENTIRE thread! (Whew - there was a lot to read!)
I'm going to put my two cents in a little bit...

When I first got Mak & Xylo I didn't expect them to be grumpy and grouchy with me. I took part in that HUGE post of bonding with Pouch Protective Gliders, and then spoke with Bourbon on the phone a million and a half times.

Erica, your doing great - really you are...I saw that you asked a million questions and did thorough research before even getting your gliders.

Now you have your gliders and you are asking for help - let them help grin

Now for this next part that I am going to tell you I'm NOT in any way telling you to do this...I'm going to share a personal story to let you know that I know exactly how you feel.

For my "step process" with my gliders my first step was to take EVERYTHING out of their cage that they could hide behind. It was awful! I came home from my lunch break one day and saw Xylo just hanging out at the top of the cage, wide awake and not moving. Of course I panicked and called Bourbon immediately. Bourbon then explained in greater detail, and provided more information on how to handle my own personal experience. To make a long story short, I am SO glad I followed the step process, and even more thankful that I didn't get all the information at one time that I was supposed to do. (I thought the first step was enough information alone! lol)

Everyone here knows that you love your gliders, if you didn't you wouldn't have asked the question in the first place on how to make their life with you better. I think you should just take a deep breath, take a step back and listen for a bit. Do the two day method that they were telling you about, and let it happen slowly. Who knows it might take a little longer for the two day process to happen then actually two days - but don't let that deter you from doing it. After the two days, you will get another set of instructions on what to do and so on. You will keep receiving instructions on how to help you and your gliders until one day you will see ALL the benefits from it. Especially if you do eventually get to the point where she is NEVER biting you - even when she is grooming.

Don't be overwhelmed...I know I was with the whole process I had to go through. If you want take a bit and read the old thread - it will take a while, but from that you will be able to see the process everyone else went through from beginning to end, and then all the stories of how the people can't believe what their gliders are doing! They are WANTING to be held, and WANTING to play and NO LONGER BITING!!
It is an amazing feeling when you do win the love of your glider over!

If you are feeling a little overwhelmed, take a few days and clear your own head first, because the gliders can sense your every emotion.

Both my gliders are bonded to me now - although the other night I was really upset about something and instead of playing Mak ran straight back into his pouch like "I don't wanna play with her when she is like this!"

After this is all said and done you will be SO happy!!
Let it happen grin

Focus on the gliders, and try to not think that everyone is thinking so negatively about you...they just need to understand the full story before they can try and help...now that they know - focus on trying this...I think you will find utter amazement in the changes that your gliders will have

Good Luck! And remember...let it happen grin

If you have any questions that you think I might be able to help on, or even if your just frustrated and worried - I've been there...my cell is on my profile, and so is my e-mail address...call or write anytime hug2


~* Gliders need a voice, they will always have mine (and my heart, too!) *~

I'm always willing to help. 262.206.2888 you can contact me anytime, day or night.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762122
04/08/09 10:16 AM
04/08/09 10:16 AM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
B
Bourbon Offline
Serious Glideritis
Bourbon  Offline
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
Erica, you say you are frustrated with us, fact is it is very frustrating, when we gave you things to do, and in almost all of your posts, you are asking questions about fututure steps, concerned about what you were WANTING to do (take them out playing with them, etc.. defending yourself, comparing your situation to another..

this all slows down the process, what you should have been concentrating on was what it was you were being asked.

in the past few days.. the above was in posts after posts after post.. many people stopped reading the thread through shear frustration. we kept trying different ways to get these things out of your mind and tried to keep you focased on what it is you were SUPPOSED to be doing..

in 2 days, you only said 2 things that was part of what you should have been doing. now I could waste more time, go back and cut and paste EVERYTHING you said that had NOTHING to do with the assignment. better yet, why don't I just cut and paste what it is you did do that was part of your assignment.. things that would let us know you were doing what you were asked to do.

Quote:
Wanted to add when I was SUPER calm yesterday she was a sweet heart and her ears perked up... I guess being calm helps.


this showed us, you learned SOMETHING about your glider and how your feeling/emotions affected your glider

this was a good thing..

Quote:
I was watching her 'body language' last night... I DID notice that she would put her ears in 'half mode' when she'd come out of the pouch... I wouldn't pet her. So I gave her her treat and her ears perked up so I pet her softly.


this showed us, that you did watch her body language and you actually listened to her..

in steps...

you noticed her ears..
you didn't pet her, cause her ears were down.

INSTEAD
you offered her a treat

she showed you , that you listened to her..

her ears perked up

THEN you petted her.

*********************************************
is this the only 2 things you have learned about them? what have they learned about you?

these are the kind of things, that you should have been posting about.

things that YOU were learning about your glider, things that could have been done differently. after all in the past you would have done things differently, and did.

so now with that being said....

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #762123
04/08/09 10:17 AM
04/08/09 10:17 AM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
B
Bourbon Offline
Serious Glideritis
Bourbon  Offline
Serious Glideritis
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
Recap on the past exercise..

things that need to be stress, things that need to be practiced EVERYDAY, EVERY TIME you are around your gliders. if you can print this out, place it near the cage so you will always remember these things.

Quote:
do not offer anything, that they have to use their teeth ANYWHERE near your hands, we have to address other issues first. For now, to give them the treats they have to bite to either get or eat, place them in toys, foraging toys(John Xglider has a great line of these), find different places in their toys to hide the treats that they can find and enjoy.


Quote:
just as no 2 kids are the same, neither are the gliders, each one has their own ways of talking to you, and each one will read you differently as well. It is up to YOU, to put words to their actions, You need to start to understand what they are feeling, why that may be, and help with possible solutions to fix it.


Quote:
a walk into the mind of your glider, a place you will find yourself, more and more, and a place that will be the starting point and the most important part of trying to help yours and your gliders relationship. You will find this is not only fun, but it will be very rewarding. learning your glider, becoming one with them requires understanding, compassion, love and a lot of patience.


Quote:
Watch their body language, learn it, try to put words, and feelings to the looks in their eyes.


Quote:
You will notice when you say that 1 sentence, your tone is now different, your demeanor is now more understanding,

understand why they may feel that way.. look at it through their eyes, their feelings, their thoughts, not yours.


****************************************

okay now before Deanna can move on to the next step...
she can not move on until she thinks you are ready for the next step.


she must have the complete answers to these following things, this was your assignment for the last 2 days.

This assignment MUST be clearly understood, learned and practiced. you will do this throughout the lifetime of your gliders.

Quote:
put yourself now in the many situations, that you have placed your glider/gliders in attempts to teach them you want to be friends with them, situations where you have tried bonding with them, before you have given them a chance to trust you. Before giving them a chance to get to know you and what your intentions truly are.

how you would have reacted if you were the glider? think about what you will in the future will do differently under the same situations thinking of life through the gliders eyes. could they have been prevented how? How could you have made things easier for the glider?


Quote:
Let us know, what you are noticing, what you are now seeing from both, your eyes and your gliders... remember from here on out, you are looking at life through THEIR eyes, working on THEIR time, on THEIR terms, not yours.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #762147
04/08/09 10:49 AM
04/08/09 10:49 AM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
B
Bourbon Offline
Serious Glideritis
Bourbon  Offline
Serious Glideritis
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,336
Bee-Bopping round SnakePit USA
(to everyone following the thread in general)

to explain the one sentence thing..

the sentence, "everything is going to be okay."

should be used alone, without any other conversation, without any other words, phrases etc..

now the question is why? since many people think the glider needs to get used to their voice.. this is true.. BUT...

remember they don't know us, they don't speak our language, they can't understand all the words we are saying.

sit back and think about this.

1. you meet some one new who speaks a language we do not.
they are rattling off and continue talking.. we have no clue what is being said.. but now if they say only one phrase, and then they show us what that phrase is, they do this over and over, we begin to learn what it means.

2. try saying different phrases..

even if your upsaet.. the one phase everything is going to be okay, should have a calming affect, not only on the glider, but also on you. when your having a bad day, the gliders should have a calming affect on you, and if they are having a bad day, sometimes it is easy to muddy the waters but just talking and talking and talking to them.. but sitting back and just saying...
everything will be okay.. kind of slows things down.. especially if you know, that is all they should hear at the time, not about your problems, not about the bad day, not about things that upset you..

3. when people ask for help, they are usually frustrated, lost for options on how to help. it is very reassuring to the owners as well, when someone comforts them, and tells them.. (even when they don't feel it themselves) that you know what..

everything is going to be okay...

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #762197
04/08/09 11:41 AM
04/08/09 11:41 AM
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,636
In paradise
hpyhwn2003 Offline
Glider Addict
hpyhwn2003  Offline
Glider Addict

Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,636
In paradise
Hi Bourbon is there anyway to get the steps PMed to me? As you know I went thru the program with Bobby and know how awesome it is. You also know that I've been walking glider owners thru the steps too. I'm asking for the steps in writing so I can have something to refer to when needed. So is it possible? Or should I scan all biting posts and try to cut and paste? I could be in the grave before I find all the steps and I wouldn't want to miss any. You know me the teacher says we should always have a hard copy. I tried PMing you but your mailbox is full so can you PM me? Also have info for you on the regular sleeping pouch issue. I know you have a full plate so I didn't want to call and use the time someone else needs for their babies. Hope all is well with you and as a side note Bobby is doing awesome! He now comes out to play with his mommy all on his own! Such a different glider thanks to you and your help!

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: hpyhwn2003] #762286
04/08/09 01:58 PM
04/08/09 01:58 PM

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One question, I do not know if you guys have seen my thread about Pagen, but Erica says her Pixie is doing the exact same thing.

I seriously do not feel it is because Pagen doesn't trust me... she seems to love to hang out with me and Jack, the one who has never biten me, is getting just as much curious with his sister. My thread is in the behavior forum as "teenage stage". I would love your opinion on it, because if there is anyway I can help my kids out I will, even if they seem cool with me now, there is always a greener side. They have even gotten where they will automatically go in my bra, especially Jack.

And I know Erica is doing so well...poor girl not being able to touch her babies... I bet that is so hard! But she is doing it smile

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: hpyhwn2003] #762363
04/08/09 03:16 PM
04/08/09 03:16 PM
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elena .. call me

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Bourbon] #762417
04/08/09 04:39 PM
04/08/09 04:39 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 10,569
IL (St. Louis area)
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Your situation is different, Monika. EVERY situation is unique. Refer to your thread to ask questions and receive answers about your specific situation.

Last edited by StitchsMom; 04/08/09 04:41 PM.

~*~Jenny and the fur kids~*~

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Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762453
04/08/09 05:17 PM
04/08/09 05:17 PM

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Originally Posted By: BelladonnasMom
Originally Posted By: prettyinpink
I'm just getting frustrated and confused... I didn't create this post to ask people to come on here to do this. I asked for help and that's what she's giving me and I've been nothing but following it.


Then what DID you ask for Erica??? You asked for help. This is YOUR thread. If this is NOT the kind of help you are looking for, you are more than welcome to ask these people to stop and leave you alone. BUT... they are here to help if you want them to, and they will. They, and myself, are not here to upset you at all. We are just offering the knowledge and experience that WE have to help you.

Please... if you want to go this route... stop being so defensive. This is not a cult, or a draft. If you aren't comfortable with all of this, neither will our gliders be...


Ok... first off I haven't read everything yet GEZZ there's been a lot of posts since I left.

Robin. I just TOLD YOU I specifically asked for help and that's what they are doing they are giving me what I asked for. What I said by saying 'I didn't ask for this'. I'm saying I didn't ask you to come on here to yell at me. I've been following it so far and I've been giving everyone my updates. I don't know what the heck I did to [censored] you off... frown
I'm sorry if I upset you. You know how much I like you tounge I was just having a really bad day when I wrote that. A lot was going on.
I'm really sorry.

Nicki -- I'm still reading what you said.

Bourbon -- I've read your first post today under Nicki's that's as far as I've gotten so far... In my response:
I told you guys I was very sorry... and Dee seemed like she understood what I had to say. I'm sorry for making you too frustrated but I've done nothing but doing what you told me to do and I DO have an update for last night!
But that's NOT the only two things I've learned about them... I specifically told you guys that I'm learning their body language and watching their eyes.
Ugg. I'm so upset I'm making you guys mad. frown I really didn't try to. Dee seemed to understand my frustration. I hope you understand where I'm getting at because I LOVE how you guys are helping me.

OK! What happened last night... I sat at their cage for about an hour or two telling them how much I missed them and everything was going to be ok. They kept jumping at the cage door trying to get out. frown Then Pixie jumped for her fith time and just stared into my eyes while I was talking and tilted her head... I busted into tears and had to leave the room so I wouldn't stress them out by crying. When I came back I made sure I was calm. And I just looked into her eyes and she kept tilting her head like a little puppy. (She has done this once before but I've never actually LOOKED into her eyes) I told her I would watch her body language more and that I was so sorry if I ever hurt her. That was a really weird moment... really felt like she was listening to me, she just sat there until I was done. It was REALLY hard to stay there the whole time without crying.

Annnnnnnd. Guess what! LOL I was watching their body language and I noticed when Pixie came out of the pouch when I called her (it's so cute when they come when they are called) her ears were up. Then when I called her some more and she jumped over to me HER EARS went down. I'm like oh god... that's upsetting. Then after a few more jumps to me I noticed her ears went up!

Pixie was so cute! She kept putting her hands on the outside of the cage to try to grab me or something. I made sure not to touch her.

I have to take off but I'll be around later to respond to the rest. wink

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762463
04/08/09 05:27 PM
04/08/09 05:27 PM

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OK bourbon I read the rest I can respond real quick (sorry to the rest of you guys I'll respond later I promise)

First for the sentence thing. I have to admit I didn't only say that. But when she looked me right in the eyes I said everything is going to be ok.

I'm writing that stuff down right now (stuff you told me to print) as my printer is out of ink.

how you would have reacted if you were the glider?
*If I was in there shoes... no questions asked everything they have done I would've done the same. Why would I trust me? Just because I think I'm going slow with them do they think that? No.

think about what you will in the future will do differently under the same situations thinking of life through the gliders eyes. could they have been prevented how?
Like we talked about before I NEED to watch their body language. Pixie was telling me she was unsure with her ears. And without one of you guys pointing this out I think I would've taken me a lot longer to notice. Even though I EVEN said I don't see any signs. I was stupid not to look there.

How could you have made things easier for the glider?
Like I said before I could've watched her more. I wish I looked into her eyes a lot more before. I'm crushed inside for what I did... even though it doesn't seem like I did anything. In reality she was telling me you're moving too fast but I didn't hear her call. upset It breaks my heart that she was telling me and I didn't listen. cry Ohhhh now I'm getting tears again.

I can't express how thankful I am right now. You guys opened me up to see into their eyes... Me thinking I already did but I didn't. frown And that breaks my heart.

If you think I'm ready for the next step... I think I am. I think WE are.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762527
04/08/09 06:48 PM
04/08/09 06:48 PM

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Ok Nicki!! I read your post.

Thank you so much for your support hug2 I can't believe they'd really want to be held? REALLY???
I mean Pixie and Tink would come out immediately when I set the pouch on my lap and come up to snuggle with me. Is that what you mean?

I've relaxed and have my mind set on this. I was just so overwhelmed I think. But when they told me to look into their eyes, they told me over and over. And I did it... and... well I guess it's just hard to explain. It's like if you go into the pound and look into a dogs eyes. It's almost as though their eyes are speaking to you. Maybe I'm crazy. But that's how I felt when Pixie just stared at me and her ears went up. I felt all happy when she just sat there. cloud9

Thanks Nicki hug2

But I have to say I'm SO THANKFUL to Dee and Bourbon. They were the ones that really pushed and pushed and stuck by my side even though I was getting frustrated.
cry THANK YOU!!! hug2

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762538
04/08/09 07:01 PM
04/08/09 07:01 PM
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 323
Twin Lakes, WI
Nicki Offline
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Originally Posted By: prettyinpink


I've relaxed and have my mind set on this. I was just so overwhelmed I think. But when they told me to look into their eyes, they told me over and over. And I did it... and... well I guess it's just hard to explain. It's like if you go into the pound and look into a dogs eyes. It's almost as though their eyes are speaking to you. Maybe I'm crazy. But that's how I felt when Pixie just stared at me and her ears went up. I felt all happy when she just sat there.


YES!!! That's exactly what they are talking about!! grin

Their eyes speak LOUDLY to you!! If you do this process with them, you will notice a change in their eyes...you'll start to see a lot more content, instead of fear or worry.

And gliders to love to be loved, and holding is part of loving them - of course every glider is different, and some aren't very fond of being held...and some like it more than others. Mak isn't a fan of being held, but my Xylo loves it! You can literally see the content in his eyes.

Keep up the good work - you'll get a lot of reward in the end. hug2


~* Gliders need a voice, they will always have mine (and my heart, too!) *~

I'm always willing to help. 262.206.2888 you can contact me anytime, day or night.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Nicki] #762550
04/08/09 07:16 PM
04/08/09 07:16 PM

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Good... I thought I was going crazy! It's like she was almost talking to me and understood what I was saying to her... because her ears perked up!

Nicki... I don't know if you've been reading Monika's thread. But Bourbon said she blocked me... So I hope she comes back. upset This has just turned into a big mess. Everyone is misunderstanding me and it's making me extremely upset. Ugg. I wasn't getting frustrated... I was getting frustrated because everyone was misunderstanding me. NOT because of what I'm doing with my babies. She said I'm not doing it out of heart... But I'm doing it because I feel like I have to. That couldn't be farther from the truth. upset

I'm so glad to hear the progress you made with your babies. smile I hope this thread can do the same... and I'm glad it's helping others.

**I've still been doing the opening of the cage door and saying everything will be ok until you guys think I'm ready... I think I am!**

OH and YES I'm sooooo sorry. I think I've just been in denial really. I just don't know what was wrong with me. Bourbon pointed out that I said she was giving me bruises. I don't know what was on my mind thinking Monika's was the same. I guess the amount of pressure does make a difference. I guess I read her post too fast. Like Pixie would literally (well felt like) try to bite me. If I had my hand by her and I wasn't paying attention... she'd walk over and bite me hard. Gesh that makes me mad. Why would I even say something like that. shakehead THEY ARE NOT THE SAME. They even told me that like 10 times. I'm so stupid... shakehead
I guess I want to think that Pixie is fine... when she's not.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762565
04/08/09 07:30 PM
04/08/09 07:30 PM
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 323
Twin Lakes, WI
Nicki Offline
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Twin Lakes, WI
Originally Posted By: prettyinpink


Nicki... I don't know if you've been reading Monika's thread. But Bourbon said she blocked me... So I hope she comes back. upset This has just turned into a big mess. Everyone is misunderstanding me and it's making me extremely upset. Ugg. I wasn't getting frustrated... I was getting frustrated because everyone was misunderstanding me. NOT because of what I'm doing with my babies. She said I'm not doing it out of heart... But I'm doing it because I feel like I have to. That couldn't be farther from the truth.




I think the post needs to stay about the gliders, lets just stop worrying about who said what - it leads to things other than making the gliders lives better...

Don't be so negative and beating yourself up about things...from here on out things will be different with your gliders - especially when you get all the steps completed.

I personally don't think your ready for step two just yet...actually I don't think your gliders are ready for step two just yet...although I'm not the one doing the steps with you lol. I think your gliders (and you) need at least one (or two more) day of still giving reassurance - opening the cage door and just saying "everything is going to be okay" Nothing more than that at all.

Deanna and Bourbon will let you know when your ready for the next step grin

Take your time, have patience and you will see more of a reward then just jumping into it.


~* Gliders need a voice, they will always have mine (and my heart, too!) *~

I'm always willing to help. 262.206.2888 you can contact me anytime, day or night.

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: Nicki] #762570
04/08/09 07:33 PM
04/08/09 07:33 PM

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Thanks Nicki... I agree it needs to stop.

I really hope I'm ready! I think I am! smile And yeah I have a tendency of beating myself up tounge I'm really hard on myself.

It was so cute last night when they came when they were called! They jumped right to the door where I was at. Made me a little upset because I knew they were asking to be out. Oh I wish I had video taped that look Pixie gave me with her ears all up. smile

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762579
04/08/09 07:41 PM
04/08/09 07:41 PM

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I'm following this thread as well! It's very helpful! However, I'm a tiny bit confused...I thought you are supposed to say "everything is going to be ok" when you open the cage door, and ONLY that. Why are you calling them? Or by "calling them" did you mean that you are saying "everything is going to be ok"?

Re: Biting. Does anyone have suggestions? [Re: ] #762588
04/08/09 07:45 PM
04/08/09 07:45 PM

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Jenny... If you did read what I wrote I said I'll have to admit I've been talking to them and saying other things than Everything is going to be ok. I wrote that right after Bourbon posted that's ALL you say.

I called them and they ran to me cloud9 they always do. And then I looked at them and said everything is going to be ok. Sometimes I add 'Everything is going to be ok, I love you so much'

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